London with Coffee # 3

The British Museum--again?

The British Museum–again?

I am getting better at being a tourist.

That means I wake up, I leave the hotel, I get lost.  And today I was so lost that I didn’t have coffee till noon.

Why would I get lost?  There is no reason to get lost.  I have guidebooks, maps, an A/Z, a computer.

There I was in the hotel room, planning my trip to the Dickens Museum.  There are Dickens walks, but I was far too tired to go on a Dickens walk.  I was in the Dickens mood, though, because I fell asleep last night reading Bleak House.

I started out at 10 a.m.  I had written everything down, but I hit a dead end.  Buildings.  On the other side I suppose the street continued.

I don’t know where I was, but suddenly I recognized a street and knew the British Museum was there.

Later I’ll go to the Dickens Museum, I promised myself.

I wandered briefly among the Greek and Roman exhibits.  I want this diadem and the ball-shaped earrings:

Diadem, decorated in relief with palmette flanked by leaves.

Diadem

Yes, it is a terrible picture, but I like the idea of wearing a diadem decorated in relief with palmette flanked by leaves.

And I saw two lovely bronze statuettes of Venus loosening her sandals.  My pictures didn’t come out unfortunately.

Okay, then I made it to the Dickens Museum.

Dickens Museum

Dickens Museum, Bloomsbury

At first I walked right past it because the sign was so discreet and I was on the wrong side of the street.  Then Doughty St. turned into John St. (Why is this always happening in London?)  I retraced my footsteps on the OTHER side of the street and found the museum.

All right, I paid what I paid and then I was in the museum.  First, the dining room.  I thought it was a bit corny.  I didn’t need the settings at the table with the names Dickens, Walter Ainsworth, Forster, etc., on the plates.  I liked the mahogany sideboard, though, which I think Dickens bought himself, though I don’t quite remember that part. And what the f- was that soundtrack in the background?  Street sounds?

I thought, Oh God, this doesn’t compare with Willa Cather’s house in Red Cloud, Nebraska.

Well, in a way it doesn’t.  But so many people love Dickens that they want to make it more commercial, I suppose.

I got hooked upstairs in the drawing room and study.  Then I felt the writer “near me.”  In the drawing room I admired the rosewood leather-topped table, and the rare reading desk he had designed and built for his readings and performances.  A podium?  Very exciting, isn’t it?  I would have loved to hear Dickens read.  And there was a tape (a CD? whatever you call it?) of someone reading Dickens aloud.  I’m afraid I don’t know what was being read.

And then in his study there was his desk from Gad’s Hill.  What is it about writers’ desks?

Dickens' desk.

Dickens’ desk.

And there were Dickens’ books in the glass bookshelf:  Shakespeare, Robinson Crusoe, and Specimens of English Sonnets.  Also a page or two of his original manuscript of Oliver Twist.  And then in another bookcase were sets of Dickens’ own books.

The rest of the house was quite nice, too.  Kitchen, bedrooms, etc.  And then I did buy a few books.  Not a Dickens mug, but it was necessary to buy a copy of A Walk Around Dickens’ London.  It’s really a sweet little pamphlet.  I’m unlikely to take the walk, but I like reading it.

I loved the Dickens Museum.  I love Dickens!

COFFEE NOTES.  Today I had to go to Starbucks.  I passed two of them, and honestly I needed my grande. One Starbucks coffee and that’s all you need.   The coffee is so good:  Costa was a little strong for me yesterday.  Will I be able to find an indie coffeehouse tomorrow?  Everybody advertises cappucchinos–but can they make coffee?

London with Coffee # 2

Book shopping, that is.

Book shopping, that is.

I realized while browsing in the Greek and Roman life room at the British Museum that my late mother would have enjoyed the tiny terracotta and bronze figures.  She collected ceramic figures and dolls, so how could she not like these “figurines?”  There were tiny figures of sacrificial animals–a ram (from Syria), a pig (near Rome), and a bull (I think it was Etruscan)–and figures of gods and even comic actors.  I loved a diminutive bronze figure of Mercury, a terracotta woman in a bath, and a bronze figure of a satyr playing double-pipes.

Perhaps they have some adorable Greek and Roman figurines at the museum store.  But these stores are always expensive, and you never like the stuff that much when you get home.  I have many souvenirs of the Chicago Art Institute, all tucked away out of sight.

On the way to the British Museum, the quest for coffee continued.  How could it not?  Starbucks, Costa, Nerro’s…  I’m on my Size Epic two.

It is beautiful here in London.  Though the spring is not far advanced, it is very green and there are some flowers. It is mild, in the 50s here, though at home it is still cold and windy–the wind never stops blowing on the prairie.

I sat outside the British Museum and soaked up the sun. I didn’t have a book in my bag, except a guidebook, so I decided to go to the LRB (er, London Review of Books) Bookshop. It is just south (or possibly east or west; God knows where I was) of the British Museum.

LRB bookshopNow I don’t read the LRB, because I already read the NYTBR, the NYRB, the TLS, and the WSJ (I made that last up:  I don’t read the WSJ), so I can’t really add anything else with initials at this time. But what a good bookstore this is! I considered a book of literary history, not usually my kind of thing, and several novels I’ve never heard of.  The whole Bailey’s Women’s Prize list seemed to be there, but I already have The Goldfinch, and must read that before adding more to my “queue.”   I was looking more for the obscure, for something I couldn’t get in the U.S.

Nothing hardback, I decided.

No problem.  Look at this haul:

IMG_2843I know, I know.  This is my whole budget for books.

Now I must get much more touristy tomorrow.  Seriously, you know how it is when you arrive:  it’s midnight, it’s only 7  at home, so you wait till 2 or 3 to go to bed, then you wake up early and turn off your alarm because you’ve only had a few hours’ sleep.

The secret:  coffee.  I’ve drunk so much coffee today.  Caffeine, caffeine!

Tomorrow:  must find really GOOD non-chain coffee in London. (I already drank all the Pickwick tea in my room.)

(Goofing on) the Trip to London

Do I want to go to London?  I ask myself.

Sure, I do.

I’m going soon.

Only I’d rather go now.

Except it’s raining in London.

Will winter ever end?

Why do I want to go to London?

I can’t remember.

I’ve planned a minimalist trip.  I’ve booked a flight and a hotel room.

Budget rooms do not have bathrooms en suite, the hotel website says.

Holiday Inn, I said to my husband.  Why not stay at the Holiday Inn instead?

No, we don’t often stay at chains.  In Bemus Point, New York, near Chautauqua, we stayed at the Hotel Lenhart,  a lovely hotel with rocking chairs on the porch and seven-course meals in the dining room…and we shared a bathroom with the people next door.

So I reserved a room at an English hotel, and pray we have our own bathroom. There is no way I’m walking down the hall at midnight.

I got the passport, and that was fun.  The clerk and I conferred about some of the odder questions on the application.  I  ended up laughing, and the picture turned out better than expected.

I’ve got two guidebooks.

I love the guidebooks.  Hmm…  I think I’ll skip the two-hour walk along the Regent’s Canal and head right to Starbucks.

No, I’m joking, though I did look Starbucks up, and there are two or three or six where I’m staying.

I hope I can find my way to an English coffeehouse.

And guess what?  There’s even Target!

All right, I’m not going to Target.

There are so many things I  want to do. The Portobello Road…museums…bookstores…the Portobello Road…museums… bookstores.  (Starbucks…)

I only know about the Portobello Road from Muriel Spark.

We’re going on a Dickens walk, provided the guide doesn’t wear a costume.

We’re going to Shepherd’s Bookbinders and get some handmade and decorative papers.

I’ll have to buy another suitcase just to hold the guidebooks.

And if I shop for books I’ll have to buy another suitcase.

Maybe I’d better not shop for books.

Satire of the London Guidebook

As a general rule, you won’t see too many people in the upscale London nightspots wearing jeans and sneakers.”–Fodor’s London

Fodors-2014-London-P9780770432157Fodor’s is an excellent guidebook.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t been laughing over it.

I love the quote above.  The idea of my going to any London nightspot, let alone not in jeans and sneakers, is surreal.

First, I must find a hotel.  According to Fodor’s, if it’s not next to Buckingham Palace, the neighborhoods are apparently (a) noisy (b) noisiest, (c) busy, noisy, and sketchy, (c) quiet as a tomb, (d) transitional and a bit dodgy, (e) near some of London’s dodgiest neighborhoods, (f) too quiet for some, (g) might be a flea pit, and (h) some distance from center.

I’ll go for the sketchy rather than the dodgy, or possibly the too-quiet-for-some.

Rather than hang out at nightspots, I must cram for my Dickens tour at night.  Finish The Pickwick Papers, reread all the other novels, skim the sketches, and peruse the biographies by Peter Ackroyd and Claire Tomalin.

And perhaps I’ll do a self-guided Dickens walking tour before the tour.

No, I’m joking.

But back to the guidebook:  I must never put down my purse in a restaurant.  AND I might want to disguise it as a shopping bag.

On the other hand, “London is a relatively safe city, though crime does happen…especially in built-up public project housing or tourist meccas.”

Below is a brief satire of a trip to London.  I do love Cornelia Otis Skinner and Emily Kimbrough’s humorous travel book, Our Hearts Were Young and Gay, and Emily Kimbrough’s Forty Plus and Fancy Free, so I’m taking a leaf out of their books to chronicle the trip I MIGHT take.
(DISCLAIMER:   I AM EXCITED ABOUT GOING TO LONDON AND NOT THIS CLUELESS.)

Day 1:  Take tube from airport to hotel.  If the tube station is 300 meters from the hotel, and a meter is 3.2808399 feet, is it times or divided by 80 or what?  If a 10 K race is 6 miles, then 200 meters is..?  Spend an hour walking around, ask directions, walk past the hotel, does it have a sign?, you don’t think you saw a sign,  you’ve been awake 30 hours, your laptop bag falls onto the sidewalk, and you still get to the hotel too early to check in.

ALTERNATIVE:  Take a hotel bus.  (Thank you, Fodor’s.)

Day 2:  Refuse to take your map out under any circumstances.  If a purse is dangerous, how dangerous will a map be? Instead, memorize your route before you leave the hotel.  Have the whole thing written in your notebook like a GPS. Walk, walk, walk.   Swallow the paper rather than divulge your sources…

ALTERNATIVE:  Take a BLACK cab (all the others are run by bandits) or the tube.

Day 3:  Get lost in the North Korean Socialist Realism Art gallery of the British Museum.  How did you get there?  Look at your map:  what’s that round thing in the middle with a fork and spoon?  You don’t Want to Go There.  Finally find the gallery you’re looking for and hope the placards are big enough to read…

ALTERNATIVE:  Ask the guard for directions.

Day 4:  Decide to go to the British Library and read about Emma Gifford Hardy, Thomas Hardy’s first wife.  (Must look up on the website and see if you can read there without getting a library card.)  You’ve always been sympathetic toward Emma, the model for so many of Hardy’s characters.    But you should  tour Hardy country first.  It’s 176.04 km. from London….  That’s 3.2808399 x or divided by  something.  No, that’s the wrong rule.

ALTERNATIVE:  Ask the hotel clerk.

Day 5:  Walk to used bookstores wondering if they’ll be snobbish.   In a very good used bookstore in Iowa, I couldn’t persuade the owner to part with a copy of Abdul Rahman Munif’s The Trench.  He said the first book in the trilogy was charming, but the second one wasn’t. I said I’d read the first and wanted the second.  Ended up buying it from Amazon. Will I go through such a fiasco in London?

ALTERNATIVE:  Remember that Fodor’s says, “American standards of customer service are rare in London…”  Wonder what those standards might be.

Day 6:  Decide to go to the Barfly:  “one of the finest in the capital, punk, indie guitar bands, and new metal rock attract a nonmainstream crowd.” No, I’m kidding.

ALTERNATIVE: No, I’m kidding.

No, I’m kidding.

My Mother’s London

When I win the Lottery, I can go to Italy on my own terms, and choose my own company.”–Margaret Drabble’s The Seven Sisters

Seven Sisters margaret drabbleIn Margaret Drabble’s The Seven Sisters, the narrator, Candida, wishes she could win the lottery and go to Italy.   One day she receives a letter:  she has come into some money.

Like Candida, I recently received a letter. I  learned that my mother left me a tiny amount of money nobody knew about: it will pay for a trip to London!

I have never been so excited.

I  come from a family of aerophobes.   My mother never got on a plane.   She seemed wistful about my travel experiences.  (I am not an aerophobe.) Even a trip by car  from Iowa City to Des Moines seemed long to her.  Near the end of her life she’d say, “I’ve never flown.”   She wished…  And she knew that my living with another aerophobe had made it impossible to cross oceans on family trips.

And so I’m planning my own trip, without the aerophobes.   Suggestions, anybody?

MY PLANS SO FAR.

1. Reread a lot of Dickens so I can be overprepared for a Dickens walking tour.   Or should I just stick to the Dickens museum?

2.   I love looking at art.  Good art, bad art, old art, new art.  So I’ll be spending time at museums.  Do you have any favorites?  Any off the beaten track?

4.  Bookstores?  Used bookstores especially?  (And should I bring an extra suitcase, or mail the books home?)

4.   Can’t-miss plays, concerts, etc. for 2014?  Or theaters I should tour?  Or whatever….

Heart of LondonAnd now here, in exchange for your suggestions, is a list of

TEN FAVORITE BOOKS SET IN LONDON.

1.  London Belongs to Me by Norman Collins

2.  The Heart of London by Monica Dickens

3.  Excellent Women by Barbara Pym

4.  The Needle’s Eye by Margaret Drabble

5.  The Provincial Lady in London by E. M. Delafield

6.  Lucia in London by E. F. Benson

7.  Mrs. Dalloway by Virginia Woolf

8. Keep the Aspidistra Flying by George Orwell

9.  The Portobello Road and Other Stories by Muriel Spark

10.  The Four-Gated City by Doris Lessing