Glamorize your glassesI just got new bifocals.

I needed new glasses desperately.

I like my new glasses very much, but I look like a hipster/schoolmarm in a graphic novel by R. Crumb or Alison Bechdel.

I can see myself again.

Although I was fascinated when I recently mistook a black iron fence for a human being, I didn’t particularly want to end up in Oliver Sacks’ The Man Who Mistook his Wife for a Hat. Everything blurry, pretending not to care, pretending I was an Impressionist painter, I knew I needed new glasses, but you know how it is:  if you’re able to see at all, you’re too busy to go to the ophthalmologist/optometrist/optician or whomever you see.

And so I went to the “optical” guy.

And my vision has actually improved, so I needed new bifocals to reflect that.

When I picked out new frames, I held my old glasses up to get an idea what they looked like.

I didn’t know what they looked like until I picked them up.

It is amazing to be able to see again.

On a recent occasion, before I collected my new glasses,  I picked up my purse upside down from a counter at the supermarket.  Change, keys, and comb went flying.  Several people went down on their hands and knees to help me pick things up .  “Oh, a butterscotch candy,” I muttered in deep embarrassment.  I felt like Mr. Magoo, or Ms. Magoo.

So you can see why I’m happy to have new glasses.

There’s just one thing.  When I try to comment at blogs, I STILL can’t see those letters you have to type in first.  You know what I mean: tiny print all running together, and you have to type it in twice or thrice till you get it right.

I thought I’d be able to look at it and get it right the first time with my new glasses.


Nobody can.

4 thoughts on “Bifocals

  1. 🙂 I hate those captcha things (except when they’re numbers because I seem to be able to see those). I *know* I need new glasses but like you say, when you can still just about see you put off investing all the time and money in new ones. I suspect I might need bifocals – I’ll be interested to hear how you get on with them!

  2. Yes, I do wish they’d come up with a better system. Why do the letters all run together like that? I’m thinking, O, or is it captial A? N or r? The numbers ARE easier.

    Bifocals are pretty much like other glasses these days, though perhaps more complicated!

  3. Kelly, I’m not fond of “captcha” either. If human beings can’t get past the “CAPTCHA” it must be really tough on the bots these days…

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